


People Like Me Don't Get Saved (We Get Left Behind)

by arianapeterson19



Series: Avengers Shorts [45]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst, Arguing, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Clint Barton Needs a Hug, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotions, Escape, Fights, Hurt/Comfort, Imprisonment, Insecure Tony, Insecure Tony Stark, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Protective Rhodey, Steve Rogers Feels, Therapy, Tony Feels, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Wrongful Imprisonment
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2017-07-07
Packaged: 2018-06-07 02:06:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6780994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arianapeterson19/pseuds/arianapeterson19
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He wasn't even surprised - and that hurt the most. Tony really wished he could be surprised with how things turned out, but he wasn't and the easy way he just took it was sad.</p><p>OR</p><p>The one where Tony plays his role as scapegoat perfectly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. No Surprise There

**Author's Note:**

> To quote another fandom *ahem* "SPOILERS"
> 
> So if you've seen Civil War, go for it! If you haven't seen Civil War, go see it! And then come have emotions with me.

It wasn’t even a surprise. As he stood next to the window, watching Rhodey struggle to relearn how to walk with the aid of the braces Tony had made him – and wasn’t that just a topic he never wanted to revisit – Tony couldn’t even bring himself to be surprised that it had ended the way it did. There was some poetic cruelty that burned in the ordeal that by trying to instill safeguards for them, people to keep them accountable as well as safe, Tony had destroyed the best form of family he’d had in years.

“This one’s not on you,” said Rhodey, eying his best friend and adopted little brother. “I know what you’re thinking and you’ve done some pretty stupid shit in your life but this wasn’t one of those times.”

“You can’t walk,” said Tony, his voice pained and vulnerable in a way that only Rhodey had ever heard, the tone the colonel wished he could record and replay for every bastard how had ever called Tony selfish or self-centered. “I’d say that’s my biggest fuck up yet.”

“We’ll address that whole problem later,” said Rhodey sternly. ”Because this is in no way your fault. But I was referring to your asshole friends who not only broke the lay and blamed you for their imprisonment but also left you to be the scapegoat. Again.”

Tony winced. He’d tried to keep the news and media away from Rhodey because it wasn’t pretty. The media internationally had raked the Avengers over the coals for all the fighting that had happened, aiming their attacks at Tony personally since the others were missing or in the case of Rhodey, injured. It didn’t matter that Tony had signed the Accords, it didn’t matter that he was acting on orders for once. The public was out for blood and knew Tony would bleed so prettily.

They were sending him to jail. Tony had received the call that morning – it was one of the reasons he had insisted on checking the braces again. Because he, Tony Stark, was finally being locked away and he wasn’t positive when he would be able to see his best friend again. There would be no visitors for him, he was being sent to the lock up on a nameless island in the north Atlantic ocean, the place the worst of the worst criminals went because there was no escape. He didn’t even get a trial – not that he really deserved one. It turned out that when it came to international affairs, Tony Stark, and following the law, a majority rules system worked.

“Well, if the braces are working for you, I think I’ll leave you to the walking thing,” said Tony. “Things t do, worlds to destroy, other people to humiliate, that sort of thing.”

Tony didn’t wait for a reply; he couldn’t stay with Rhodey or he would shatter completely. And as he sat on the small jet, handcuffed and gagged, Tony replayed that final conversation with Rhodey and felt less cold, less alone, because he may have lost everything but Rhodey was still there for him, still believed there was some good in Tony – which was the only comfort Tony would get.

\- People Like Me Don’t Get Saved –

Tony quickly discovered that the prison he had been taken to was inhabited almost exclusively by people the Avengers had fought. The guards were ones sent out to that forsaken island because they had discipline problems themselves, so they often turned a blind eye on most of the activities the prisoners partook in, unless it looked like it would end in death.

As he lay in his cell that first night, the bed hard and lumpy, the air cold, the moans and growls of the other prisoners echoing throughout the compound, Tony thought of the cell phone and message Steve had sent him.

Tony had to admit, Steve held out longer than he thought, waiting a whole month before springing the others. It wasn’t fair of Steve to talk about how he had next to no betrayals in his life when Tony could count on one hand the number of people who hadn’t betrayed him. It wasn’t fair of Steve to pretend he cared about Tony at all – to act like he and the others would help Tony if he needed it – after turning his back on Tony and nearly killing him. Steve had already proved that he would lay everything to waste to keep Bucky safe, starting with Tony. The only pro of the entire situation was that at least on this island Tony knew everyone was the enemy.


	2. Paid the Price

Rhodey was sitting on the couch in the Tower, nursing a scotch. Tony had been gone for almost two months and the colonel was only slightly closer to finding him than when the genius had been escorted from the complex. All he had to go on was that Tony had been imprisoned for the crimes of the Avengers. The media reported it as house arrest on one of his private islands but Rhodey knew it wasn’t true because Tony didn’t own islands – he hated being surrounded by water.

The billionaires assets would have been frozen with the arrest but Tony had signed everything over to Rhodey before they arrested him, so Rhodey found himself in the empty Tower after being honorably discharged from the Air Force because of his injury and consequently left without a home off base.

“Colonel,” came the crisp, respectful tone of Steve Rogers as he and the hoard of escaped Avengers stepped out of the side elevator, the one leading to the private entrance to the Tower. “How have you been?”

“Fuck you,” said Rhodey, glaring at the lot of them from the couch.

“I know that the last time –“ began Steve.

“No!” shouted Rhodey, standing up with the aid of his braces, one of the few things he had mastered on his own. “Tony may have let you all walk in here like nothing happened because he’s a fucking martyr with way too much heart but Tony’s not here right now. I am. And since it’s my fucking Tower, I’m ordering you lot to get your sorry asses out now or I’ll call the police, SWAT, the fucking Red Coats, or whoever is supposed to have authority over you!”

“We were all pardoned,” said Clint, making himself at home with a drink. “Like, a month ago, so the police won’t arrest us. We aren’t on the run anymore.”

“The will for breaking and entering.”

“Tony said we were welcome anytime,” said Wanda. “I know we didn’t end on the best of terms but I thought with all the amendments made to the Accords that he pushed through for us that it was his way of apologizing.”

“Holy shit,” said Rhodey, sitting back down in surprise at their gall. “You guys are so full of it.”

“Where’s Tony?” asked Steve, looking around as though the billionaire was going to jump out and say surprise. “I thought for sure he’d be here.”

“Wrong yet again,” said Rhodey harshly. “That seems to be your natural state, Cap.”

“Where is he, then?” asked Sam, starting to feel uneasy. “We know he’s on house arrest but-“

“He’s in jail,” spat Rhodey, causing everyone to freeze in their shifting. “You know, that place you all actually deserve to be for breaking the law? But no, you break the law, get sprung from jail, and get pardoned while Tony gets stuck cleaning up your messes yet again. You know, for people who claim to be a team you all rather suck at it.”

“What do you mean?” growled Clint, leaning over the bar.

“Where were any of you for the fallout from any of your missions? You go on a mission, people die, you go back to the compound to lick your wounds while Tony goes to assess the damage and handles the press. You do realize he doesn’t even go on many missions because he’s too fucking busy trying to work out deals with the governments of whatever countries you all saw fit to help – usually while furthering your own damn goals – so that they don’t arrest you, right? Did any of you even read the Accords? The reason they existed was so your shits wouldn’t get arrested. And those amendments you think he pushed through as way of apology? Yeah, they were set to go into action as soon as the Accords were signed. Because that’s how fucking politics work, you fix the document after it’s in place! Tony told you that! It wasn’t an apology, it was what he was doing from the start, saving your sorry asses.

“He locked me in my room!” yelled Wanda, red steam flowing around her fingers.

“And because you’re a spoiled brat who is partially to blame for the fucking Ultron fiasco – don’t you even get me started on that because you live off the man you mind raped – you didn’t even stop to consider why he wanted you locked up.”

“He said it was to protect the world from me.”

“No, he said it was for protection. He wanted to protect you. People were furious with the situation you caused, they were out for your blood, so Tony tried to keep you safe from that. It wasn’t for the worlds protection, it was for yours.”

“Colonel –“ began Steve.

“Actually, it’s just Rhodes right now,” said Rhodey. “I’ve been discharged because I can’t fucking walk. And you, Steve Rogers, are the worst of them all.”

“What-“

“You claim to be team leader but you only lead in battle, leaving Tony to handle the rest. You’re so stubborn! You wouldn’t even consider things like an adult so you acted like a child.”

“I did not! I did what I thought was right.”

“No, you acted out of grief,” said Rhodey, his voice suddenly quiet, which was somehow worse than the shouting. “You had just lost Peggy and you were scared of losing Bucky too – your last connection to the life you no longer have – so in some misguided attempt to honor Peggy’s memory, you stood up to the first conflict you came across and quite frankly, I think she’d be ashamed of you.”

“Shut up!” roared Steve, advancing on the seated man. “Don’t talk like you knew her. You know nothing!”

“No, you know nothing,” snapped Rhodey. “You knew Peggy for a few months back in the 40’s. Tony knew her for his entire life. And because I actually give a damn about him, I knew Tony’s Aunt Peggy too. So I know for damn sure that she would be pissed as hell to find out you hurt her kid in her memory.

“And you know what the hell of it is?” continued Rhodey with a brittle laugh. “Tony wasn’t even shocked when they arrested him. Because you selfish shits never bother owning up to your actions and he gets blamed for everything so often that he honestly thinks it’s all his fault.”

For a long time, no one said anything, partially because they were shocked but mostly because there was nothing they could really say to defend themselves from that.

“I didn’t think,” said Steve, his voice choked, making it difficult for him to continue his unfinished thought.

“You’re right, you didn’t,” said Rhodey with narrowed eyes. “And look who paid the price.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I needed some protective Rhodey. Sorry all you Team Cap readers, I honestly do like Steve, I swear, I just love Tony more. I'll make it better. 
> 
> Still thinking on pairing. No worries, I probably have enough time since I tend to write slow builds...
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


	3. With Friends Like These

Tony refused to leave his cell more than absolutely needed. The guards forced him out once a week to meet the required social time – and that was a concept Tony wanted to protest on the grounds that he hated socializing when he was a free man and he doubted prison was much better. When that didn’t work Tony tried to point out that he’d had more than enough socializing with all the events he’d had to attend, so he should be excused along with several other prisoners. But no one listened to him so yet again Tony found himself hobbling out of his cell to the ground floor for group therapy. 

Group therapy was run by a guard who had taken a few courses on psychology back in the day and that somehow qualified him to run a group. The entire house was usually spent bashing Tony anyway; it didn’t take a professional to do that, the media did it for free.

“Who would like to begin today?” asked the guard who Tony liked to call Chief, sounding bored.

Buttercup started, as usual, yelling about the injustice of being confined for nearly blowing Arkansas off the map and how it was Tony’s fault for stopping him from gaining proper recognition with the entire Manderian fiasco.

“Mr. Stark?” prompted Chief, looking very much like he was trying to grow a brain. “A response?”

Tony rolled his eyes, he had mentally prepared himself to putting on the front that he was still that tough billionaire who had entered several months before. It was exhausting and half the time he just sat silently but it had been several sessions since he had last spoken, so he knew it would be time again.

“Next time you want to blow shit up, check the super villain calendar to make sure no one else called dibs,” said Tony with a shrug.

That sent Babycakes off, which pissed of Ronald, sending the entire group spiraling into utter chaos in record time. Tony used the fighting to slip back to his cell. If he was lucky – which he wasn’t – they wouldn’t send him to the yard again. That was his usual punishment – forcing him to go out and be with the other prisoners where it was open and he was the easiest target. The prisoners hated him with a passion and quite frankly the feeling would have been mutual if Tony could bring himself to feel more than fear. His show of bravado in group was just that, a show.

Going into the prison, Tony had known he wasn’t brave. He wasn’t good. He wasn’t even innocent. So when the other prisoners sought him out for revenge, eventually Tony quit fighting; it was some form of cosmic justice and he deserved every last degrading act.

He was hiding under his bed like a child – his father would have a heyday if he knew but the man was dead, curtsey of the Winter Soldier – when the sound of fighting and screaming reached his ears in an intensified version of the usual noise. Tony curled up further into a bell to wait it out, burrowing into the shadows, hoping that this time – this time – they would swallow him whole.

“Tony?” came the utterly familiar voice that haunted his nightmares. “Are you in there?”

The genius couldn’t bite back a whimper, curling even more around his aching body, his courage used up for the day in group therapy to piss off his fellow prisoners.

“Tony?” said Steve, stepping into the room. “I have him.”

Tony was fairly certain that Steve wasn’t talking to him but it didn’t matter because Tony wasn’t coming out regardless.

“Tony?” said Steve, crouching down and peering under the cot. “You want to come out?”

“No,” whispered Tony, flinching back from the man who had left him stranded in Siberia and hating himself for sounding weak.

“Why not?”

“Because at least here I know who my enemies are,” spat Tony.

“Rogers, move,” growled another voice.

Shockingly, Steve moved without arguing his point. He was replaced by an untidy mop of hair and smudged glasses.

“Bruce?” said Tony, no longer sure it wasn’t a hallucination.

“I called Pepper as soon as I heard,” said Bruce. “Rhodey begged me to come with these guys to get you. He’s waiting in the jet. It took a while but Pepper finally got you cleared, so you’re coming home. There were two dick senators who protested but we finally got it cleared.”

Tony shook his head.

“Tony, come on man,” whined Clint, one eye on the door. “Let’s get out of here, the natives are getting restless.”

“Want Rhodey,” whispered Tony to Bruce, softly enough that he knew the others couldn’t hear him.

“He’s on the jet waiting,” assured Bruce. “Here.”

Bruce pulled out his phone and dialed Rhodey’s number. It rang once before being answered with video, Rhodey’s face filling the screen.

“Rhodey,” gasped Tony, lunging at the phone, snatching it out of Bruce’s hand. “Where are you?”

“I’m out on the jet, kiddo,” said Rhodey, easily slipping back into the role of protector and brother that he held for Tony back in college. “Go with Bruce. I’ll meet you outside of the jet, okay?”

“Don’t hang up,” said Tony, inching his way out of his hiding spot, his body not quite recovered enough from its last beating to move much faster.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” said Rhodey, not for the first time wishing he could use his legs properly so that he could run to where his best friend was. “How you holding up?”

“Let’s go to the Manor and relive all of my childhood memories, that would be less fun but we can make it work,” suggested Tony.

“That bad, huh?”

Tony stumbled down the hall, ignoring the jeers of the prisoners and presence of former teammates in favor of the phone in his hand linking him to his oldest friend. On the other end, Rhodey kept up a steady stream of jabber.

His first breath of fresh air in months was cold and sour tasting and completely overshadowed by the man waiting next to the jet. Tony all but ran to Rhodey and collapsed against the man in a fashion similar to Afghanistan while the other Avengers watched, feeling emotions they would rather ignore because they settled uncomfortably in that place they could have sworn held their hearts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting to lean towards no pairing for this one....
> 
> Any fics good fics I should read? I'm sorta in the mood for some Tony and Clint...
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


	4. Deserved

The ride was supremely awkward. Tony spent the entire time sitting flush against Rhodey’s side, whispering to his long time best friend and ignoring the rest of the people he used to call friends. Steve and the others kept shooting the pair looks but no one had the nerve to say anything. When they landed, Tony hauled Rhodey to his feet and pulled him along, disappearing into the depths of the Tower penthouse, leaving the rest of the Avengers to stagger out on their own.

“So,” said Clint, rocking back on his heels when they were all standing awkwardly in the kitchen. “This is sufficiently uncomfortable.”

“Well I should hope so,” said Bruce, glaring at the others. “You lot owe Tony an apology of epic proportion.”

“We didn’t arrest him,” said Clint but it was a weak argument and they all knew it.

“No, you didn’t,” said Bruce. “You didn’t do anything. That’s one of the biggest problems here. You guys never do anything. You let Tony take the blame for everything. You let Tony clean up and pay for all of your messes.”

“It’s not like you stuck around after the Ultron fiasco,” said Steve.

“Captain America,” said Bruce, rubbing the bridge of his nose and looking exhausted. “Tell me, who exactly were you protecting? Was it the American people or your best friend?”

“I was protecting Bucky. I’d do the same for anyone on this team.”

“Except for Tony.”

Bruce sighed and walked away, presumably to the lab, leaving Steve to stand with Natasha, Sam, and Clint. The super soldier couldn’t respond because there was honestly nothing to say. Bruce was right; Steve would willingly tear apart the world for every member of his team but not for Tony. When it came down to it, Steve had proven that Tony was the first person he would take down.

“He’s right,” sighed Steve, turning to face the others. “I don’t regret protecting Bucky but I never would have done the same for Tony. And maybe I could have gone about it better, but I don’t regret it.”

“We all should have handled it differently,” said Natasha. “I still don’t think Tony was wrong. I think the Accords are important and quite frankly we just proved that with this whole thing. We go unchecked, no one stops us, and people pay the price. Do you know how many agents you killed escaping with Bucky? And what, you get pardoned? Do you know how many Tony killed? None. That bastard goes out of his way not to kill people in case you hadn’t noticed and instead of getting pardoned like the rest of us murderers he goes to jail. Because he actually tried to follow the law, he paid the price. Something has to be done. We owe more than just Tony an apology, we owe the rest of the world.”

“We aren’t going to fix this overnight,” said Sam.

“You’re not even that guilty,” said Steve. “You were only following me.”

“My choice.”

“How did this get so fucked up?” groaned Steve, rubbing the back of his neck, unsurprised when no one answered.

\- People Like Me Don’t Get Saved (We Get Left Behind) – 

Tony showered and changed into sweat pants and a soft shirt that was probably Rhodey’s at some point. He knew that no amount of scrubbing was really going to make him feel clean again but it was worth a try and at least he no longer smelled like that jail that even the sun had forsaken. When he emerged from the bathroom, Rhodey was sitting on the bed reading a book.

“You clean up nicely,” stated Rhodey.

Tony didn’t respond more than curling into a ball at the edge of the bed, his head resting in Rhodey’s lap. Rhodey hummed and started combing through Tony’s damp locks.

“You want to talk about it?” asked Rhodey after several minutes.

“No,” said Tony.

“I yelled at the others,” said Rhodey. “They were being idiots. You have to know that. This one wasn’t on you. No, you shouldn’t have fought them but you also were doing what you were ordered to do. They took it too far.”

“I’m buying a car and restoring it,” said Tony. “But not a really old car, just an older car that needs some love. Like a 1969 Jaguar or a 1967 Impala. No Mustangs.”

“Sounds good,” said Rhodey. “Can I suggest getting some sleep first?”

“I didn’t understand it at first,” said Tony so quietly that Rhodey almost didn’t hear him. “I didn’t get why they hated me so much. I wasn’t trying to hurt them, I didn’t want to fight them. They were like family to me, Rhodey, so why did they hate me so much?”

“Tony –“

“Before I was arrested, I knew I was supposed to say something inspirational, something to go down in the books. Or maybe I should have written a letter to you telling you some deep seeded emotion I never had the guts to say before I left, I didn’t bother. It was the end of the line for me, I knew that, and there was nothing I wanted to leave for the world to remember me by because I didn’t like the world enough to leave it a memento.”

Rhodey shook his head sadly because the world didn’t deserve Tony Stark. The world didn’t deserve to be saved but Tony still insisted on saving it. Tony didn’t deserve to be put through so much for a world that truly didn’t appreciate him but what made it worse was the fact that Tony thought even less of himself than the rest of the world. And those friends of his, the ones that claimed to care for him but ended up being the ones to abandon him when a new toy came along in the form of the Winter Soldier, they only made it worse.

“But in prison, with all those people I helped put in there, I got to know them, I heard why they hated me. They all had reasons for what they did – not good reasons but reasons. And I think I get it now, because I sorta hate me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update!!! Yay!
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


	5. Cleaning the Broken Bits

Tony bought a beat up 1967 Jaguar 420. Rhodey found him the next morning with his junk pile of a car, elbow deep in the engine replacing the intake manifold gasket. The body of the car looked decent but still needed a lot of work. The genius would have to work the siding to get it back to it’s original shine, a few dent would need to be hammered out, and the paint was in need of some touch ups but it was the internal workings that needed the most attention. Rhodey found that oddly appropriate for how his best friend was – a bit banged up on the outside but it was the inside that needed the most attention.

“Not your usual type of car,” commented Rhodey, sitting down on a rolling stool. “Not exactly a classic.”

“Don’t listen to him, Honey,” said Tony, petting the engine. “He doesn’t know you like I do.”

Rhodey snorted and shook his head. Sometimes only Tony could see the full potential of an object. The car wasn’t hideous but it also wasn’t worth the usual amount he spent on a car. The billionaire would spend more fixing the thing than it would be worth new. But Tony clearly saw something in that car and Rhodey had long ago learned to trust his judgment.

For an hour Tony just worked on the car, moving from one bit to another until he was sitting on the ground with the alternator in front of him, meticulously cleaning it before he placed it back in the car.

“A lot of people don’t even know the alternator exists until it breaks down and they have to replace it,” said Tony suddenly, causing Rhodey to look up from where he had been playing fetch with Dummy.

“Not everyone is into cars,” said Rhodey, unsure of where the genius was going with the conversation, if indeed he was trying to start a conversation and not just making ideal comments as he worked.

“But they think the battery is what runs the electric side of the car,” insisted Tony. “They are always concerned about their battery, if it’s charged, if it’s old. If the car won’t start they think it’s the batteries fault when it could easily be the starter or the alternator that is broken. And more people know about the starter but not as many even consider the alternator as a probable cause. But this little bastard is the cause of a lot of strife.”

Rhodey grunted to show he was listening but didn’t know what words to say; Tony seemed to be wound up about a part of the car that wasn’t even broken, just needed cleaning.

“You see, if the alternator isn’t working then the battery won’t run to it’s full potential. You could be sitting at a stop light and the radio will suddenly shut off. Most would think that the radio has a problem but the real culprit would be the alternator and shortly after that the entire car would stop running. Such a small part, relatively unknown, and yet with the potential to cause so much damage.”

Several minutes of silence passed.

“What are you trying to say?” asked Rhodey at last.

“That if I ever wanted to take over the world I would meticulously mess with every alternator in every car and watch the chaos that followed,” snapped Tony. “I don’t know, Rhodey, not everything has a point!”

But as Tony continued to tinker with the alternator, Rhodey couldn’t help but wonder if his friend felt like he was the alternator – important, forgotten, and not receiving enough blame for the damage he thought he caused.

\- People Like Me – 

Natasha had fucked up. She had spent the months after The Fight trying to think of a better way to phrase it – she had scoured the English language looking for better words to describe what she had done but there was no better way to say it, no way that truly captured what she had done, besides saying that she had fucked up. She had fucked up big time. And Natasha hated that, she hated that word – fuck. It was vulgar and made her sound dimwitted, which she wasn’t, but it fit perfectly.

Tony had trusted her, she had worked for years to gain that trust after she had deceived him in the beginning of their friendship. But when push came to shove she had chosen Steve (Clint) over Tony and betrayed him. The nature of the betrayal was what bothered her the most, because she hadn’t outright turned on him. She hadn’t stood next to Steve in the faceoff, she had the chance to stop them, to bring them in, but instead she had let them go. And while she let them go, Tony was busy trying to protect a kid in battle and watching his best friend nearly die. Rhodey had nearly died because she let Steve and Bucky go. That was on her and she knew it.

She thought she would never feel worse about something than she did about her actions before she met Clint. She was wrong.

“Bruce?” said Natasha, standing at the door of the room Tony had specifically designed to be a calming environment. Originally it had just been for Bruce but the others used to seek it out, so the billionaire had added elements for all of them.

“What?” said Bruce, his tone not as harsh as it could have been, so Natasha took that as permission to enter.

“I suppose you hate me,” said Natasha, sitting next to Bruce on a yoga mat.

“No,” said Bruce, eyes closed, back straight, hands folded neatly in his lap. “I don’t hate you.”

“You should.”

“Tony should. You didn’t betray me.”

Natasha nodded.

“You’re seeking out the wrong person for forgiveness,” said Bruce, turning to look at Natasha.

“I know.”

Bruce closed his eyes again and went back to focusing on his breathing. He breathed in to a count of seven, held it for a count of seven, then breathed out to a count of seven. Seven was his number, not for any particular reason other than it was something he had noticed Tony doing once when the billionaire was fending off a panic attack. Bruce used to do his breathing exercises to the count of five but Tony had done it to the count of seven and like a bad habit, Bruce had copied him. He never asked Tony about the odd number and he doubted Tony would give him a serious answer if he had.

“I’m sorry,” said Bruce. “For leaving.”

“I’m sorry you needed to leave,” said Natasha. “But I know why you did. I just wish you had trusted us enough to help you through it. You know we would never let anyone take you away, you know that Tony –“

Natasha stopped talking because that was the crux of the matter. The team may not have let anything happen to Bruce but Tony was somehow always a separate entity and Tony would have gone above and beyond to ensure Bruce was safe. Bruce, who destroyed a small city, would have been safe if Tony had let him help instead of leaving. And Tony still had worked to keep Bruce safe. He had fought the courts, claiming all rights to the super soldier serum and all attempts at recreating it. With those rights, he also paid to help rebuild that city, had taken the bad press, had spent countless nights in the workshop producing new products to pay specifically for that accident, and Bruce had left him alone to do that.

“I wish we supported Tony as much as he supports us,” said Bruce.

Natasha wished that too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay! That was on me and real life.
> 
> There will eventually be a happy ending for this story, it's just that there are so many emotions to deal with first. 
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


	6. We are not Soldiers

“I’m not going to apologize to you,” said Clint, leaning against the kitchen door while Tony waited for the coffee to brew.

“That’s nice,” said Tony, his eyes riveted on the machine, wishing it would brew faster so he could get out of the kitchen.

“I’m not sorry for what I did,” continued Clint and the archer wasn’t sure if he was fishing for an argument or just being an asshole, but either way he couldn’t seem to stop.

“Honestly I didn’t think you would be,” said Tony, refusing to look away from the coffee mug.

“And the Accords were a shitty thing for the start.”

“Fuck you,” said Tony, tearing his gaze from the counter and glaring at the archer, his temper snapping to life and ready to rumble. “Fuck you, Clint. Do you want to know how your wife and kids made it not only untouched but also under the radar? Because it sure as hell wasn’t because of you or your fucking contacts. I sent my own fucking friends in to protect them. Want to know why I chose to do that? Because they are good people. Fuck you. Fuck all of you! The Accords were to protect everyone. You didn’t even read the damn things! You went off of fucking Rogers’s word and are prepared to burn me at the stake for it. Fine, whatever, think what you want. But if you insist of being an utter asshole then I insist that you leave. Because I’ve got more than enough shit to deal with without adding you and your fucking complexes on the list.”

“Finally!” said Clint, slowly clapping. “You stood up for yourself. Looks like prison didn’t change you too much after all.”

“Changed you pretty fast,” said Tony before grabbing his cup of coffee and walking out.

Clint stood mostly in the kitchen for a long time, wondering how true that parting statement was.

\- People Like Me –

Sam was at the VA when he spotted Tony Stark next to the receptionist’s desk. The genus looked to be finishing up his business so Sam took the opportunity and approached him.

“Hello,” said Sam, mentally cringing at how mundane the greeting was.

“Hello Sam,” said Tony, nodding at the other man, not acting hostile but not warm either.

“I’m just about to start a group meeting if you want to join,” said Sam. “I mean, if you don’t have anything pressing.”

“I’m not a veteran, Sam,” said Tony, this time with a small, sad smile, as if he actually believed those words. “I’m just here to make my biannual donation.”

“You’re not on our list of donors,” said Sam, his eyebrows crinkling.

“Yes he is,” said the receptionist, a man named Ian. “Mr. Yinson Kindle, he makes a donation twice a year. I remember because it’s a shitton – sorry, I mean a lot – of money and it’s always three months apart, which is strange because biannual donations are generally six months apart.”

Tony cringed at Ian’s little speech. 

“Walk me to the meeting,” said Sam.

Tony nodded reluctantly and followed the man to a large room that was already set up for a meeting. Sam made a beeline for the coffee in the back, poured two cups, then walked a few steps away and leaned against the wall, holding out one cup to Tony. The billionaire shook his head.

“I don’t like to be handed things,” said Tony.

“Okay,” said Sam with a shrug, having heard stranger things. He set the coffee cup on the folding table that Tony had made himself at home on, and sipped his own drink.

“Yinson was a doctor,” said Tony after several seconds, his hand reaching for the abandoned coffee. “Kindle was a soldier I knew.”

“Where did you meet them?”

“Afghanistan.”

“You were held captive there for three months,” said Sam slowly.

“Yeah, and I blasted my way out and now I’m here,” said Tony quickly. 

“Just because you didn’t sign up doesn’t mean you’re not a veteran,” said Sam. “You went through some pretty deep shit, man. Shit that only the people here are really going to understand.”

“I didn’t go willingly,” whispered Tony. “I built the weapons that ended up killing our own guys. I never went through training, I didn’t protect the soldiers in that car, I was dragged into that cave kicking and screaming and I couldn’t even save the one man there who deserved to live. I didn’t protect my country, I built weapons that attacked it.”

“I’ve read the files, Tony,” said Sam just as quietly, aware of the other people filtering into the room. “Your business partner sold your weapons without your knowledge. The instant you found out you set out to make it right. It wasn’t your fault. And as for not going willingly, what do you think those who got drafted felt like? They’re still veterans same as you. Just stay for the meeting. You don’t have to talk, you don’t have to do anything but sit in the chair and drink your coffee.”

“And if I don’t like it?”

“Then we’ll never mention it again. I’m not going to tell the others you were here regardless. Just give it a chance.”

Tony didn’t respond and Sam decided not to push him. Instead, he went to the front of the room and greeted some of the regulars. He kept an eye on Tony, who was still sitting on the fold out table in his workshop jeans, a large sweatshirt, and a ball cap. He wasn’t instantly recognizable as the billionaire genius who wore suits and shoes worth thousands but he also wasn’t unrecognizable. Luckily, the group as a whole wasn’t interested in him, so they ignored Tony. By the time Sam started the meeting, Tony had migrated from the table to a chair in the back corner, closest to the coffee machine and furthest from other people.

\- People Like Me –

Steve was watching the footage of the events that had taken place months before. He saw it from all angles, at varying qualities, with and without sound, and for the first time since he had started watching, he stopped studying Bucky and started watching Stark.

Seven. Steve counted no less than seven times in one battle alone that Tony could have ended the fight by killing Bucky but each time the genius went for a different angle. He never aimed to kill and the more he saw that the more enraged Steve got. The captain had been so convinced that he was the only one who could save Bucky – the only one not out to kill him – that it infuriated him to know he was wrong.

“You’re starting to see it,” said Rhodey, leaning against the wall of the media room where the footage still played out on different screens.

“What?” snapped Steve.

“You’re starting to see that you were wrong, that you could have let him help and things probably would have turned out better, and the weight of that is killing you.”

“Going to gloat?”

“As much as I would like to – and trust me, I plan on gloating in the future – I’m here to offer you an olive branch of sorts.”

Steve turned to the colonel and looked at him skeptically.

“Tony is my priority,” said Rhodey. “I don’t like you – any of you – at all but for some reason Tony does. You all were good for him until you acted like assholes and Tony needs all the support he can get right now. You forget, Rogers, that Tony was never trained for this, he’s a civilian, and he’s been through more than you. So as much as I hate you, I’m here to say that I won’t actively look for a way to kill you if you stop being a shit and try to be a human. For Tony.”

Steve wanted to argue, to negotiate, anything, but as he opened his mouth to make his point, he saw opportunity number eight that Tony had to kill Bucky that he didn’t take.

“Fine,” said Steve with a sigh, shoulders drooping in defeat. “Tell me how to make this right.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a dream last night that RDJ found this account and read all the stories I've written where I'm a complete jerk to Tony and it was mortifying but when he asked why I just shrugged real awkward like and said, "This is not the worst thing I've been caught doing." Then I woke up.
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


	7. Plans

Tony had a plan.

Tony loved plans the way he loved lists – which was quite a lot if his list folder was anything to judge. Some people thought Tony had built not one but multiple AI’s because he was lazy and wanted a computer to do his work for him. That theory was idiotic because if Tony Stark was actually lazy he wouldn’t have bothered putting in the incredible amount of effort it took to create an AI and would have instead just hired someone to wipe his ass or whatever. No, one of the main reasons he built the AI’s (besides being lonely but no one could prove that) was because they helped him make lists and reminded him of said lists. His brain was often turning too quickly to accomplish everything he wanted before moving on to the next shiny topic, so verbalizing his ideas helped them see the light of day.

His plan was fairly simple. Ultron had been a mess but he was learning to come to terms with the fact that it wasn’t all his fault. If he had known he was close to cracking the secret to the Glow Stick of Destiny he never would have left it unattended and he had JARVIS watching it – and that still hurt, seeing his baby torn to bits – so that little shit Ultron was a bad egg to start with. His first move was to destroy Tony’s baby, his best friend, and that was something Tony would never have taught it. But that mess was still on him and while he had been spending his time trying to fix the bits of the world he had inadvertently destroyed, he also put move resources into discovering who exactly had died as a result. Those people who lost their lives were the ones he was seeking to honor and so the first part of his plan was to build a memorial to each of them. It wouldn’t bring them back – nothing would – but it would give their families a place to honor them and the world a location to remember.

The second part of his plan was to contact T’Challa.

Part one of the plan was already rolling ahead, so it was time to get to part two.

“Greetings,” said Tony to the screen when T’Challa’s image popped up.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Stark,” said T’Challa, nodding at the older man with an amount of dignity Tony never seemed to achieve. “What can I do for you?”

“You let the Others stay with you after the fiasco a few months back,” said Tony, cutting right to the heart of the matter. “No, don’t deny it, I keep tabs on things because I’m nosy and paranoid. I’m not calling to blackmail you. I’m calling to ask to pick your brain on a few topics.”

“Okay,” said T’Challa slowly. “I’m not comfortable discussing such matters unless in person. Why don’t we set a time to meet up and talk? I have a business meeting scheduled for next Thursday in your nations capital. Could we meet then?”

“Yes,” said Tony. “I’ll pick you up and we’ll go somewhere nice before I start with the serious. FRIDAY will put something in your calendar.”

T’Challa was going to protest having Tony’s AI do anything to his private and secure calendar but Tony was already gone. The genius was quick and T’Challa had the distinct feeling that he would need to be on the top of his game if he was going to handle it.

\- People Like Me –

“Did you bring me into that fight under false pretenses?” demanded Clint, glaring at Steve in the gym.

“What?” said Steve, wiping sweat from his eyes, panting a bit at the archer.

“When you called and said Wanda was in danger, you needed help, and Tony was trying to stop you in an Ultron-like fashion, did you lie?” clarified Clint.

“Clint,” said Steve, his voice pained.

“You fucking did, didn’t you?!” yelled Clint.

“Not really,” said Steve, having the good grace to look ashamed but not enough grace to apologize. “Look, I may have misrepresented a few facts to my benefit and made things seem a bit more dire on the Wanda front than they were, but-“

“Don’t you but me! You fucking lied to get me to side with you!”

“Bucky-“

“Tony!”

Steve froze, unsure of why Clint had yelled the billionaire’s name.

“I read the Accords,” said Clint quietly. “Just now. The originals and the new. Tony was on the right track. They weren’t perfect but he had notes on what he was going to push through to fix and when. FRIDAY showed me. Steve, Tony had a fucking ten year plan that would slowly change bits of the Accords until they were perfect. It was a brilliant strategy, it made it so by the end we would have everything we wanted but it would have happened so slowly in a give and take rotation, that no one would have noticed.”

“But Bucky needed help then, not in ten years.”

“Wanda was never in danger, was she?”

“Tony had her locked up!”

“To protect her from the world! FRIDAY showed me the threats being made against her, Steve! Against all of you!”

“Threats? What threats?”

“The threats that come when you fucking destroy towns and cities! Fuck, are you that naïve that you think all those people who get their homes destroyed are going to thank you for saving them when they don’t have a place to live?”

“I know I fucked up!” screamed Steve. “You don’t have to keep rubbing it in!”

Clint sighed and slid down the wall. He kept doing that, he kept picking fights, pushing people’s buttons until they snapped. He knew he was doing it, he was disgusted with himself for doing it but he couldn’t stop. It was one reason he hadn’t gone home yet; the last time he called his wife, he had pushed and prodded until it ended in a screaming match and her telling him not to bother coming home until he shaped up.

“There’s something wrong with me,” whispered Clint, soft enough that he knew Steve heard but no one of normal hearing would get. “I can’t stop being an asshole. I know I’m doing it and I just want to tell myself to stop but I can’t and it’s ruining my life.”

“You and me both,” said Steve, tiredly.

“You both are idiots,” said a calm voice from the doorway, causing both the trained assassin and super soldier to jump.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still no internet. Moving is the worst. Thank goodness for coffee shops. 
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


	8. Dark Nights

Phil Coulson stood in the doorway in his pressed suit, arms full of papers, glaring at the two men. Steve and Clint had read one of the dumped files that stated Phil Coulson as alive so they knew Fury had lied to them before, but reading it and seeing him standing in front of them in the flesh were two different things.

 

“Agent Coulson,” said Steve, striding forward, hand held out. “It’s good to see you again.”

 

“I’m sure it is,” said Phil Coulson drily, ignoring Steve’s hand and looking over the blondes shoulder at the archer. “Agent Barton.”

 

“Agent Coulson,” said Clint stiffly.

 

“Both of you, come with me.”

 

It was said so calmly but both the soldier and the archer knew it was an order they would not disobey. This was not the same Phil Coulson they knew before the Battle of New York. This one was different and yet so similar at the same time, like a puzzle piece that fit the others but had a different picture on it.

 

“The two of you will take a seat,” said Phil Coulson, indicating two seats around one of the tables in the office they had entered. It wasn’t terribly unique or overtly decorated. The table was small enough for a private conference, the room crisp but not cold with calming paintings of the ocean on the walls.

 

Clint and Steve sat down, both of them looking rather like school boys who had been caught doing wrong and knew they were about to get their consequence.

 

“So here’s what’s going to happen,” said Coulson, setting down the files and papers on the table. “You two are going to move into apartments away from Stark. You, Barton, are going to start therapy because you’re out of control. Steve, you’re going to therapy as well. Neither of you are going to have any contact with Stark until approved by both your therapists and myself. Do you understand?”

 

“Yes sir,” said Clint softly, looking at the table.

 

“Agent Coulson,” said Steve, protest in his voice but no longer in his eyes. “I agree that I should not have contact with Stark at this time but you can’t actually make me move or attend therapy.”

 

“As your boss, yes I can,” said Coulson, his eyes flashing dangerously at his former hero. “I am in charge of the Avengers of which you are still a member. I cannot clear you for active duty mentally if I do not believe you will follow orders. Also moving out is something I have run by Colonel Rhodes, FRIDAY, and Bruce. All of them agree that it would be best for Stark if you both left until you can behave properly. Now, pack your bags and get to the cars waiting down the stairs. You have an hour. Do not try me.”

 

Before they could argue, Coulson left the office, taking his files with him.

 

  * People Like Me –



 

_The ground was cold but it was better than being in sight. Tony had learned that after the first few nights – stay out of sight when possible. It’s not that they forgot he was there if they couldn’t see him but they often were looking for an easy victim and by not being readily available they often moved on._

_Tony could fight them – he was strong, quick, and anything but an easy target normally – but he was exhausted and just wanted to sleep. Sleep was such a rare commodity that he had to take it when he could. Jail, it turned out, was time consuming and not at all the empty time people made it out to be. It was nothing like had had expected, but that also might have been because he was on an island in the middle of nowhere and not a state prison._

_It was morbidly humorous but Tony had thought he was over what happened to him in the desert. He had assumed that it was the worst thing that was ever going to happen to him. Even falling through the portal – which had be haunting in its own special way – was not as terrible as his time spent in a cave. And he had spent time and effort to move beyond the cave but being in jail showed him exactly how far he still had to go._

_Jail was nothing like the cave and yet so similar. He was being kept in a place he didn’t want to be, he had been forcibly removed from where his best friend was, and he was locked up with people who hated him. It was cleaner than that cave but the ground was just as hard. The guards were just as brutal if not more so than the cave. Tony wanted to hate them but he couldn’t because they were just doing their job – the job they loved if their gusto in carrying out supposed discipline was anything to go by._

_But while the days were bad the nights were worse and as the footsteps came closer Tony could feel that this was one of those nights that hiding under his sorry excuse of a bed would not be enough._

 

Tony woke with a gasp.

 

He was in the living room, on the couch. The movie he had been watching was still playing on the screen, indicating that he hadn’t been asleep for long. That was a shame because he was going to meet with King T’Chella in a few days and he needed his sleep.

 

“Here,” said Rhodey, handing Tony a steaming mug of coffee and joining the billionaire on the couch.

 

“Thanks,” said Tony, taking the mug with shaking hands.

 

“Do you want to talk about it?”

 

“No,” said Tony, taking a large gulp of coffee, relishing the way it felt burning his throat. “But I’m getting there.”

 

Rhodey clapped him on the shoulder but it wasn’t sad like it usually was, it was hopeful and Tony wasn’t entirely sure he deserved that hope but was willing to take it and run with it. With another gulp of coffee, Tony stood and marched off to his workshop, ready to make a game plan or take on the world – probably both.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Yay for internet! Thanks for being patient with me. Now I should finish unpacking.
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


	9. Chapter 9

Continue to next chapter


	10. For Real This Time

It was a much smaller group than that first meeting he had attended. Sam had placed him in a smaller group that sat in a circle and Tony was convinced it was because Sam still hated him – why else would the man expect Tony to sit in a circle with a bunch of strangers?

Nine people plus Sam, that’s how many people there were in the group. Tony made it ten people plus Sam and he never counted Sam as a person. Sam was still on his questionable list but there was no way any of the other people in charge would let Tony sit in on meetings if they knew he wasn’t a true veteran. No matter what Sam said, it wasn’t the same thing and Tony knew it. It was the reason he still hadn’t said a word in any of the meetings. 

“Tony?” said Sam. “Is there anything you’d like to say today?”

“Yes,” said Tony, looking up challengingly. It had been a long few days, he’d barely had any sleep with all the nightmares and work, and he was tired of feeling out of control. He needed something – anything – to help him feel grounded. Maybe if they knew he was a fraud then they would tell him to go and that would settle the emotions raging inside him a bit.

“The floor is yours then,” said Sam, his surprise showing on his face.

“You know that saying ‘Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them’?” began Tony, looking around the circle at the men and women who all stared back, interested in finally learning something from the silent interloper. “I could never figure out which category I fell in. And I’m definitely one of them. Some have argued that I was born great. Being born the only child of a millionaire seems to qualify for born great. Others said I achieved greatness by being a genius and graduating college so young and then going on to achieve even more. And a select few have thought that I had greatness thrust upon me by my work as Iron Man. Personally, I’m leaning towards that last option right now.

“I never asked for any of this to happen to me. I didn’t ask to be born to Howard Fucking Stark, I didn’t ask to have a million and seven thoughts running full steam ahead all the fucking time, and I certainly didn’t ask to be held captive and tortured in the desert for three months and be forced to fight my way out. I never got a say in any of it. I was born with cameras flashing and thought it was normal. I know what you’re probably thinking, ‘Poor little rich boy who had everything,’ and you’re right to be bitter. Hell, I certainly am.

“I’m bitter that my father spent more time trying to find Captain America then he spent in the same room as me. I’m bitter that my mom – who was distant at best – couldn’t bring herself to be around me when Howard was gone because I reminded her of her absent husband. I’m bitter that I’ve never known what privacy is. I’m bitter that the entire world watches my every move and are ready to condemn me for the slightest mishap. I’m bitter that I spent so long developing weapons, thinking I was helping protect you guys, only to find out that my mentor was dealing under the table in the most violent way possible. I’m bitter that I spend three months in a fucking cave being tortured and threatened and forced into killing to survive. I’m bitter about so many things.”

Tony took a deep breath and wondered when he had stood up.

“But mostly I’m tired,” sighed Tony, resuming his seat. “I’m just so tired of fucking up, I’m tired of everyone blaming me for everything. I’m tired of being held accountable for actions that weren’t my own. I’m just really tired.”

For several long moments, no one spoke. Tony stared at the ground, truly feeling the exhaustion he had voiced in his bones.

“I know we’re not supposed to compare experiences since each one is different and shit, but I think you officially win at the suckiest go,” said Tyler, a thirty-nine year old veteran who rarely gave opinions and was the sole survivor of his core group that was ambushed. “Like, shit man. I never even thought about Tony Stark as a person before, you know? That’s it’s own type of war right there.”

“That’s an interesting take,” said Sam. “Can you expand?”

“I don’t know,” said Tyler with a shrug. “It’s just, we were trained for this, you know? We signed up, got training, shit like that. But Tony didn’t, he just got shoved into a shitty situation and made the best of it. And I’ve watched the media tear him to bits over everything and never said a word because Tony Stark was always this different being, like he was on a whole other playing field and that somehow made it okay to degrade him. I never thought about how every day he has to go out into a hostile world and defend himself – or more often just take the abuse – while trying to make the world a better place. It’s the same thing we did only he doesn’t get to go home and try to live a normal life, he doesn’t get to take off his uniform and blend in, he gets to keep fighting.”

“That’s not what I was trying to say,” said Tony.

“No, what you were trying to say is that you don’t think you belong here,” said Tyler bluntly. “But you’re too busy having your pity party to realize that none of us are kicking you out. So you the way you went about serving the country was a bit unorthodox, who cares? From what I gather that’s pretty par for the course of your life. It’s what you’re going to do now that’s the big question.”

Tony stared at Tyler, unsure of how to answer.

“Shit happened,” said Tyler. “We’ve all seen the battles, we saw the big blow out between you and Captain America. It sucked. Quite frankly I think there was more to it than what they showed on TV – pretty sure that document was the right direction because power can’t go unchecked, clearly – but you’re here now. You’ve taken the first step to moving on. So what’s the next one?”

“I guess,” said Tony softly. “I don’t know. I need to think it over. But I’ve never been very good at doing that on my own. I have to talk it out.”

“Then that’s step number two. Talk it out. Start here, figure out what it is exactly that’s stopping you from moving forward, and then fix you.”

“I like fixing things,” said Tony with a private grin.

Sam continued watching, wondering how his life had come to this; how had he become the leader of a small group containing veterans and Tony Stark, the man he fought against months before?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you. I've been able to remove myself from the situation; thank you for being so patient and supportive.
> 
> Also, now that Tony has a base of understanding, we can focus on making things better for him. Also, soon T'Chella gets to join the fun!
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


	11. Home

Back at Rhodey’s apartment – home, because as much as Tony wanted to think he had his own home he couldn’t because that home had belonged to the Avengers and they had all left – the colonel settled Tony up on the bed to rest after he had changed into more comfortable clothes. Group sessions always seemed to exhaust the genius but Tony seemed to be getting better and Rhodey wasn't going to stop progress just because it could be unpleasant - he knew all about how painful progress could be. 

“Need anything?” asked Rhodey, perched on the edge of the mattress, body angled towards Tony in such a way that Tony almost couldn’t see the braces that supported Rhodey’s legs.

Tony shook his head because while yes, he really needed for the last few months to have not happened, there was nothing Rhodey could do about it. And Rhodey was the type of person who needed to fix things – especially for Tony because early on in their friendship he had come to the realization that if Tony didn’t fix things himself, no one else ever would. That just wasn’t right, so no, James Rhodes fixed as much as he could for Tony.

“Alright, well I’m going to put a pizza in the oven then,” said Rhodey. “I’ll be right back. Yell if you need anything.”

As Rhodey walked out of the room, Tony couldn’t help but think about how the entire ‘Civil War’ (though there was nothing civil about it) could have been avoided if not for another James. 

Tony couldn’t fault Steve for wanting to save his James; Tony would easily tear apart the world for his own James so he would be a hypocrite for thinking Steve shouldn’t do the same. The difference between them was that Tony wouldn’t let it tear his family apart over it. Tony was Jim Kirk and Steve was Spock in Star Trek. Tony didn’t believe in no win situations and Steve could only ever see one or two possible solutions. Tony had found a way for everyone to win – maybe not get what they wanted right away but no one had to get hurt or exiled – but Steve could only focus on saving his James, who ended up not needing any saving. 

But Steve had lied to him for years about his parents deaths. After the initial shock, Tony knew that it wasn’t Bucky’s choice to kill his parents and while he was still working on coming to terms with the knowledge he no longer held Bucky accountable. Steve had lied to him, Tony knew Steve had lied – or at least manipulated the facts – to Clint to get the archer on his side. Wanda was always going to think the worst of him because she was young and had been so driven by anger for years that she couldn’t just give that up. Tony didn’t even know Lang but he supposed that hate for Howard was transferred to his son upon his death. He couldn’t blame Sam either because Steve was Sam’s Bruce and Tony would help Bruce no questions asked as well. Tony should have figured that Natasha would switch sides. When he met her she was lying about who she was to get close to him so why on earth would that change? But the big problem with all of those people was that they still had so little faith in Tony that they wouldn’t trust him enough to know that he was doing everything he could to protect them.

They didn’t seem to understand that countries wanted to arrest them for the damages they caused – damages he had been working with said governments to try and fix even if he hadn’t been there to do the destruction. They didn’t seem to understand that there needed to be guidelines, that they couldn’t just assume they were needed in a country because maybe – just maybe – those countries had plans in place to stop their own villains that they hadn’t cared to share with the Avengers. And the Accords weren’t perfect but they were the best they could do at that moment and the rest Tony had plans to gradually fix, in small ways so that people thought it was their idea to make the change, which always made people more agreeable. But the Avengers didn’t trust him and now they were back.

“Hey,” said Rhodey, slipping onto the bed beside Tony, setting the steaming pizza between them. “Want to watch a movie?”

“I’m not an idiot,” said Tony, looking directly at his best friend, needing someone to hear that. “I’m actually very clever. I want to talk to Rogers.”

“Tony-“

“Not right now and not until we have both had time to calm down, but I want to talk to him. I want to talk to all of them. I need them to know what they missed when they were too busy jumping to conclusions to ask intelligent questions.”

“Okay.”

Tony could have kissed Rhodey in that moment. He was reminded yet again why that man was his best friend, why this James would always trump every other James. Because sure, Steve’s James was an ex-assassin who could probably kill anyone to ever exist and the two went back decades and had each other’s backs in a war, but Tony’s James was still better. Tony’s James had seen a nerdy little teenager who was thrown into a world of socialization far beyond what he was ready for and instead of letting him flounder he took him under his wing and helped him out. Tony’s James had liked Tony for himself and not his money – the first person near his age to do so – and had searched for three months in the desert for him, even when everyone else had written him off as dead. Tony’s James had never once given up on his friend but beyond that, he had always, ALWAYS, called Tony out when he was being an idiot, and maybe if Steve had had a James like Rhodey to do that for him in this century then things might had been different. 

“Thank you,” said Tony, closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the headboard while a movie started up in the background.

“Eat some pizza before you fall asleep,” advised Rhodey. “You’re going to need your strength if you’re going to meet the King of Wakanda in a few hours.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So....not given up on this story. I know I deleted the note in Chapter 9 about the whole reason I stopped writing this story. So for those of you who found this after that was deleted or have forgotten, I found myself in an abusive friendship and this story hits so close to home because of the topic that it's made it very difficult to write. I'm not giving up on this story, I'm just taking it slow.  
> Thanks for understanding and thanks to those who are still reading this.
> 
> Always,  
> Ari


End file.
